I just want the liberty to walk down the street and hold someone's hand and not worry about what the neighbors are going to say.
Of all the things in the world, that is what I'm jealous of, right now.
Is that shaytan messing with my mind?
Maybe it's really time I considered this for real.
I mean, I have been.
The only thing holding me back is my desire to shape up and see results.
I can see results other ways, right?
What is my true intention?
I know what I want and I don't want it.
But I really, really want it.
Shit. I'm going to sleep.
I just need to study.
I seriously woke up, went to chemistry, ate lunch, went to work, did some homework, went to tutoring, then came home. At 10 PM.And I've spent 2 hours doing things at home like talking to people, eating, and wasting time on Facebook and Xanga.
I wasted a good two hours.
I need to be studying.
I need to keep my mind off of the things shaytan wants me to think about, and keep my mind on the things that will help me increase my knowledge so I have a great answer to God in the Hereafter... because I want to please God.
I'm so so so bitter.
I'm only ever bitter, anymore.
I hate it.
I hate everything about my life, these days.
Nothing to look forward to.
Seriously, the best part of my day was work and chemistry.
How fucking sad is that?
I need to plan a vacation.
I refuse to just sit here the entire summer.
Comments (6)
It's not bad to want that. But, with your husband. Not a boyfriend. I'll say this much--I've been wanting to do the same thing for so long now. =[ *sigh*
@teeraljannah - You're entirely right, and I'm glad I'm not the only one :(.
*exactly what the first commenter said* i feel the same. :) now more than ever. bas yeah it's shaytan, so block him out and keep yourself for the man you're gonna spend the rest of your life with, in sha Allah. :D
goodluck planning vacation, you need a break! <3
whoa, i found the muslim bunch here!
@teeraljannah - oh he'll come along someday. and no, its not iblees, cuz you cant blame everything on him. a part of you is influenced by all what you see in the street and even in the media, and you want to go with the flow and be like them.
but thats not how it works.
cuz he who is stronger, is he who walks against the tide.
x
@hippocrissy - Indeed. But, it is shaytaan that makes you wish to do the same as the kuffar. That's his job. To make us err in our path. But, as long as we are steadfast and strong in our imaan, we can't go that way inshaAllaah.
oh and asalamu alaikum =D (if you're muslim haha)
@teeraljannah - 3alikum al salam =)